Success in business or relationships isn’t just about hard work or skills
I’ve blogged before about learning to promote myself to get better jobs, because working really hard but being invisible was not helping me succeed. It’s an important lesson to learn! And it’s reality…often the best workers are not the ones who move up the corporate ladder because our charisma, self-promotion and connections matter more than just working quietly.
I keep this book by my bed and read a few pages every once in a while. There’s a lot of good information, so I try not to overwhelm myself by reading it all at once. I want to really think about the ideas and focus on the ones that speak to me. The book basically has 365 short paragraphs with tips on how to improve your chances of getting rich in business–and a lot of them are more about your personal qualities.
Tip number 233 stood out to me today. It says:
In a personal service business, our fees will usually rise in accordance with your self-esteem and not necessarily in accordance with your level of skill or results.
I know this is true, because I’ve lived it! We have to sell ourselves in business or careers to get people to believe in us. How can they have faith in our abilities if we don’t have faith in them ourselves? And how can they notice us if we don’t show off a little? I wrote in that previous blog about how I tried that, and got noticed by my department’s director. It worked and it was surprisingly easy!
But I also want to think about this in terms of relationships–not just with bosses or clients, but with others. For those of us looking to date, do men really want a woman who puts herself down and minimizes her good points? Or do they want a woman who isn’t afraid to shine? I’m not talking about bragging, but about being confident. How many of us single ladies have wonderful, loving qualities to share, but keep missing out on good relationships because no one knows what we have to offer? Or how about friendships? If we hide our strengths and put ourselves down, are we going to find good, healthy friends? Or within our families…do our relatives respect us less than they do our cousins because we don’t love ourselves? This book may relate to the business world, but I consistently find that the tips relate to living a fuller, happier life in general.
All of the parts of our lives work together to create a whole person–a person who is fulfilled and confident…but always learning how to improve. That’s what Life as You Make It is about–reaching our potential and our best lives!