I’ve mentioned before that I follow a very helpful career website and page on Facebook. It’s called Classy Career Girl and I find it incredibly inspiring! As I’ve noted, not only do I have a history of attracting unpleasant dates thanks to being non-assertive, but I’ve also been a slacker about finding a good career path for myself. I have not been good about speaking up for myself or showing my bosses my true worth. I have been too shy to apply for BIG jobs and I have settled for jobs I know I can easily get. I get scared about finalizing plans or making decisions. I get nervous about committing to a goal because I feel like it means that I’m, (at least at that time,) closing the door on another career goal that interests me.
As part of my recovery from narcissistic abuse, I’m improving my life all over. So, even though “meeting” strangers and talking on the phone leaves me anxious, I decided to take advantage of the complimentary coaching phone call Classy Career Girl’s Anna Runyan is offering. Just talking about my plans and my dreams for my business ideas got me really excited, and after my call with her, I’ve been working for hours on my ideas. I plan to sign up for her coaching course because I think it would be a great resource to push me towards my goals before I wimp out!
I have a long list of ideas I want to work on, but I almost fear starting them as though maybe I won’t be good enough, or maybe I’ll fail. That’s just silly. If even half of the ideas on my list did what I hoped, I’d be so delighted and successful. So many famous entrepreneurs will tell you that they failed many times before they hit the right idea. So tonight, I started taking charge of that list. For the past few months, I’ve planned to do many of the things on it, but I’ve been a bit leisurely about it. Tonight, that stops. I am going to take these ideas seriously and see what happens!
I’m sure these types of choices come naturally to many women, but they are learning steps for me. I truly believe that very good things are coming my way, and that I am going to make it happen. I’ve felt helpless for years–like a victim of my circumstances and a victim of the unstable behavior of first two addict parents, then later an abusive ex-spouse. When someone is acting crazy in your life, and you are powerless to “fix” them, you often feel like you cannot control what happens to you. Well, it is true that I can’t stop people from acting crazy and I can’t make them act responsibly, but I can proactively take control of my own life.