“Should have” is the most useless phrase in the world
We’ve all made mistakes–sometimes horrible choices that screw up our lives for months or years to come. We often confide in other people and try to find a way to clean up the mess. The absolute least helpful thing you or anyone can do is focus on what you did wrong and talk about what you what you “should have” done. What are you supposed to do? Get in your time machine and go back to make the right decision? No! You can’t do that. So what’s the point of beating yourself or others up about what “should have” happened? It’s a waste of time. It also causes you to get stuck in the past when what you really need to do is move into the present and think about the future…and how you can correct the problem. So next time you find yourself worrying about what you “should have” said or done, stop right there and move on to what you are going to do next instead. It’s the only way to keep moving forward!
Don’t let others tell you what you should have done…ask them what happens next instead.
Today I am thinking about how tempting it is to take instant results instead of waiting for something better. How many times do these trips down dead-end roads steer us away from our real goals and the road we should be on? Do we take dead-end jobs because they pay more money immediately, but end up missing out on real careers that start slowly but pay off in the long run? Do we date the person that’s kind of fun for now and waste our time, which keeps us from meeting the person we really want to be with? Do we take a day off work to play and miss out on making money that we need? It is so easy to pursue instant gratification, but in the end the cost is often more than it’s worth. There is a need to take risks to get to our end goals, but it is important that we don’t take too many detours from our real desires, because every quick and fun dead-end keeps us from reaching what we really want. Real success and satisfaction comes from looking ahead in life and never settling for the cheap imitation of what we truly desire.